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  • Writer's pictureCalvin

Against The Grain

I’m a chronic Googler. When I’m feeling down and out, I google online about ways to get out of a funk. Ways to be happy. Ways to be more fulfilled. Ways to be more productive. Ways to change your habit. There is something for everything on Google these days. It’s a plethora of wisdom and know-how.


And I’m appreciative of the knowledge that Google has given me over these almost two decades of existence. But I also feel like some things are meant to be experienced on your own - regardless of what Google says or doesn’t say.


Some things, you just need to experience by your lonesome. And come up with your own ideas. Whether they are perfect or not, it doesn’t matter. Sometimes, you just got to do it for the sake of doing it. Making an imperfect decision is what many of us have to do these days.


No one ever makes the perfect decision. The one that transcends all decisions. And sometimes, it’s okay to do something against the grain. Something that is not approved of by the Google masses. Sometimes, it’s okay to stand out against the crowd. There is no perfect decision. You can’t satisfy everybody. And sometimes, you just need to have the courage to stand on your own.


I think about Kyrie Irving and his decision not to get vaccinated. Even though, I am pro-vaccine and I really want him to return to play for the Nets, I respect his decision as a full-grown man. As an individual with his own free rights on what to do with his body. He is an example of someone who is controversial (to say the least) yet is unafraid and unapologetic about standing on his own - despite the public criticism swirling around him.


So, even though I would personally encourage Kyrie to get vaccinated, I admit that it is purely for selfish reasons because he gives the Nets a better chance to win a championship this year. So, sometimes, the critics out there are critiquing you out of their own self-interest. They don’t want what is best for you. They want what is best for themselves.


That’s not the case for all. But it’s good to surround yourself with supportive people that have your well-being in mind. That are not out for their own profit or their own gains. It’s important to identify the right people to include in your circle of friends and acquaintances.


I think about my current relationship issues, and how I am admittedly Googling much about how to solve them. The more I read the multitude of articles out there, the more I realize that many of them say the same things over and over again. And even though there is something to be said about well-intentioned advice online, it’s still not the end all be all for everything.


Sometimes, for better or worse, you make your own decisions and go against the grain of what everyone else is saying. There’s no right or wrong. There’s just what is. There’s just what you do. You are responsible for your actions, and you don’t have any obligation to do what other people want. You do you. That’s all you can do.


Having said that, Google does have knowledgeable advice on important topics - such as health - from credited websites and knowledgeable professionals. So, I’m not saying to totally disregard what’s out there. For example, all the good information on COVID vaccines should not be disregarded. And even though our government is not perfect, I personally regard science as an important factor in my decisions related to health.


So, it’s important to just weigh all the possibilities and come to a well-informed (even though not perfect nor ideal) decision. It’s all about balance - as my Toastmaster friend points out. Making a well-informed decision but not be too paralyzed by analysis neither. It’s a fine line. And again, there’s no right or wrong.


So, make your own decision. Don’t be afraid to make the inevitable mistakes. That’s what helps you learn for the future. And the future is bright if you look at it closely. Make sure that you see that and realize that we are all beautiful pieces in this world - trying to get by, trying to make it, trying to make a name for ourselves.


I think it’s important that we don’t subject ourselves to complete acceptance of everything. That we occasionally make decisions that go against the grain of what is supposedly healthy or not healthy. It’s again a fine line. But occasionally, it may be necessary for growth and wisdom.


Think for yourselves. Don’t weigh too heavily on what the critics say. You do you. That’s all you can do. And if what you do is against the belief of others, then so be it. It’s not the end of the world. We are all here to live our individual lives. Hopefully, we can leave the world a better place than when we came in.


But you are your own individual with your own responsibilities with your own ability to think and decide independently based on your own context. We all have that right. And it’s important that we exercise it to the extent that is possible. Because not everything is going to be rosy and approved by the masses.


Sometimes, dissent is a necessary component of growth and truth as a whole.

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