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  • Writer's pictureCalvin

Hold The Fort

Sometimes, you just need a little bit of peace and quiet. A chance to walk alone. Go experience some solitude. Just breathe in and breathe out. It’s been a few weeks since my mom left for Taiwan to go visit her sister. And, I’m home with my fiancée and my dad, trying to keep the fort down.

I must admit that I was a bit stressed and worried at first. On if I would be able to do a good job. Would I be able to hold the fort down? Would I be able to take care of my dad? I was making something out of nothing.

I kind of realize that thru it all, I am not alone. That I am receiving considerable help from my fiancée, who is helping with the cooking and cleaning. And just there for moral support in general. My dad, himself, is still in good spirits and is helping out putting out fires at work. And I’m trying my best to keep at it as well.

So, overall, it’s been a good team effort and we are doing well so far. And I hope that my mom has a good trip in Taiwan. Enjoy the relaxing days there and the good food. It’s hard to travel during these pandemic days, so it’s worthwhile for her to simply enjoy her trip and have a good time.

If we have any needs, we’ll let her know. But, as of now, everything seems to be going fairly okay. Fairly smoothly. Knock on wood. It makes me realize that many times we make big deals out of nothing.

We spend our time worrying for something in the future. And then when that thing actually comes, we realize that it’s not as scary as we thought. We just prepare wisely and do it (whatever it is). And let the chips and results fall where they may.

So far, that’s what this experience has taught me. That if you prepare wisely and you have the proper team and system in place, then things will go usually as planned. And even if they don’t, you have the confidence that things will work out in the end.

I spent some days worrying about little things happening around the house. Like, what if the house runs out of electricity? Or what if our refrigerator breaks again? What if this? What if that? And it makes me absolutely stressed out for no reason.

I’ve come to be better at managing my stress levels - whether it be during work or personal time. If you let it run wild, stress can be in all facets of your life. It will be endless. You’ll worry about the time. Worry about your dad. Worry about your relationships. Worry about yourself. The “opportunities” to worry are endless.

It’s all about putting things into perspective. Asking the right questions. And preparing fully for the situation at hand. And so far, that’s what I’ve done. I kind of feel like I have all the resources needed already to live an engaging and independent life. I’ve just rarely had a chance to do it.

Now that my mom is in Taiwan, it’s a perfect opportunity for me to step up and be more active around the house. I’ve been checking the mail, washing the dishes, taking out the garbage, mopping the floors, and vacuuming the house during these weeks. Makes me miss my mom. And it also makes me realize how there are so many countless behind-the-scenes stuff people need to know in order to fully thrive.

I respect the people who do these “unrecognized” chores now. I respect the daily grind a little bit more. Of having to pay the bills. Write the check. Taking out the garbage. Stuff that adults need to do. To make the family run that much better.

I’m doing more of these things over these past few weeks. And when my mom eventually returns home from Taiwan, hopefully I’ll have developed good enough habits to keep it going. To keep improving. To keep staying active around the house.

Holding the fort down until my mom comes home is a great learning experience. We learn the most in times of change. When a big move needs to take place. When a tragic loss occurs. When we’re dealing with a struggle or a challenge. That’s when the pressure cooker rises up and we can produce gems in our lives.

We can really thrive in pressure. And it’s been a continuous learning experience. I’m also endlessly thankful to my fiancée and my dad for continuing to support and share their wisdom to the group. It’s been a total team effort, and I certainly cannot do it alone.

It’s been even (dare I say) a little bit fun these days. To do more chores. To take care of my dad. To enjoy the little things. After all, we’re still in the midst of this pandemic (granted it is slowly improving in the USA). The least we can do is enjoy and appreciate the mundane aspects of life a little bit more.

Stay present. Stay inspired. Stay focused on the task at hand. And continue learning and holding the fort down.

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