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  • Writer's pictureCalvin

On Top Of The World

I’m writing this entry as of now in a good mood. Feeling like I’m on top of the world. I just went out to watch a baseball game with my good friend and had a blast. I just came back from a doctor’s checkup and my eye is fine with no worries. I feel an adrenaline rush whenever I go outside, feeling like I’m a part of a great big world.

Feeling great. Feeling like I’m on cloud nine. Not wanting this feeling to disappear or dissipate. But, I know that it is just a feeling. It’s just a temporary illusion. It’s not something that I should grasp onto for all eternity. It’s just that these feelings are rare and far in between.

It always seems like there’s something dragging me down. Something holding me back. If only that one particular situation were fixed, then my life would be so perfect. If only this. If only that. It comes back to bite me. Never feeling like the present moment is enough.

Always chasing a feeling. The next desire. The next goal. The next problem to solve. Always something that’s keeping me from achieving the ideal state. That’s how we are generally conditioned. To grow. To learn. To improve. There’s nothing wrong with that of course.

It’s just that there are times when we achieve everything that we can ever dream of, and we feel like we’re on top of the world. Maybe we won a gold medal at the Olympics. Maybe we got that promotion we well-deserved. Maybe it’s getting married or having children. The achievement of all achievements.

At that moment, you feel like everything is going right. Like you’ve reached Mount Everest. No, Mount Olympus! You feel unstoppable and that the world is at your fingertips. And you cherish that moment and savor it for as long as you can.

And then, just like that, in a matter of days, months, or years, that feeling dissipates and you’re back to feeling normal again. The feeling of invincibility slowly withers away and you’re back to feeling like a regular old human being.

Even Olympic gold medalists have this feeling. They don’t feel ecstatic all their lives. They have their bouts with anxiety, depression, and other disorders, just like all other human beings. Sometimes, the pressure consumes them and they are never the same.

Yes, the feeling of being on top of the world is temporary. Enjoy it while it lasts. And savor it for all you can. But, just know that it won’t follow you around forever. It will come and then it will go. Enjoy it and then let it go when it suits you. Be grateful that you’ve known that feeling for a temporary amount of time. At least you’ve experienced what it feels like to be at the top.

That’s just how life rolls around. One day you’re at the top, the next day you’re at the bottom competing for scraps. Don’t get too up nor too down about your current status. You are not alone. Everyone goes thru these peaks and valleys. When you’re feeling down, just know that that feeling is temporary as well. And that won’t last neither.

Sometimes, what seems like a blessing can be a curse. And what seems like a curse can become a blessing in disguise. You never know what life throws at you at any moment. Just embrace. Be grateful for all that happens. And see everything as an opportunity to learn and get better.

I’m still working towards becoming a full-fledged adult. I know I will never achieve that goal, because there really is no end goal to achieve. It’s all a continuous process. One to embrace. One to work through the ups and the downs. Becoming a mature adult is not something that you achieve one time and then that’s it. It’s something that you need to work on for your entire lifetime.

And in many cases, those are the best forms of self-development. Ones with no set endpoint. Ones where you are continuously competing. Continuously forging your own path. Continuous learning from your pain and mistakes. Because that’s what mistakes are for. To help you grow into a more full-fledged human being.

So, know that life happens to all of us. The peaks will come and go. The valleys will come and go. And hopefully, it will make us all the better and wiser. It will make us all the more endurable and mature. Because that’s all that we can do in this life. Roll with the punches. Go with the flow. And make ourselves into a continuous process of self-growth and self-nurture.

We will cherish the good times. We will embrace the difficult times. And we will use all of our experience to shape us into better versions of ourselves. So, when you’re feeling like you’re on top of the world, feel grateful for it and cherish it for what it’s worth. Appreciate that you know how that feeling feels, and realize that the feeling is only temporary.

Bathe in its transience for as long as it lasts.

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